How important are boundaries in marriage?
Dating someone and being married are similar but different.
In scripture, the book of Mark tells us…
“Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Mark 10:9
And when two people decide to join as one, setting up some boundaries in the relationship is important.
Establishing Boundaries in Marriage!
Believe it or not, establishing and maintaining boundaries in marriage can oftentimes make or break a relationship.
For instance, Christian Life Coach Christina Barnes who is passionate about seeing marriages restored and provides tools to prepare couples for married life. Shares how an old female friend began to call her husband around a year into their marriage.
This female friend was excited to talk to her husband because she had recently changed careers and it was similar to what he did. She wanted to meet up with her husband and talk about her business ideas.
However, at the time, Christina decided to establish a clear boundary that if her husband was going to meet up with an old female friend she was going to meet up with her as well.
So, they all went running together.
Now, it’s important to understand. The message and the boundary that Christina was establishing that when a male and female are meeting “one on one” there is an intimate connection that is created. And Christina wasn’t comfortable with the idea of another woman establishing an intimate connection with her husband.
Her husband was more than willing to honor her boundaries and rather than meet one-on-one, they chose to meet as families instead.
On the other hand, we all I have heard about relationships that end up being broken because boundaries such as these weren’t established ahead of time. And it’s heartbreaking when two people that loved each other have to learn how to move on after divorce. Especially when it could have been prevented if some boundaries had been put into place.
Importance of Healthy Boundaries in Marriage
Does every relationship between the opposite sex end up with someone cheating on their spouse?
Absolutely not. But the thing to remember is boundaries in marriage are meant to enhance and maintain a relationship.
In this instance, what did Christina’s husband (or their marriage) have to gain by him spending time alone with a woman?
If we are being honest, not much. And anything that could have been gained probably was gained when they met up together as families.
In the end, establishing and maintaining boundaries in marriage is a good thing.